What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
My ass is underappreciated
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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