you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
