i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
