I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
