Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
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