After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I am spending my child support on dildos
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
