It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
