Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
