im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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