Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize