also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
