i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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