Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
