didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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