the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
How's work?
Spinning.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
