spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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