At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
