piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Soap is not a condiment
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize