i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
the liver wants what the liver wants
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
