it wasn't lemon gatorade
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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