People in love make me want to vomit
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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