Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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