Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Just cropdusted the office
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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