i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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