i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
