to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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