Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
