I feel like abortions should bother me more
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
