would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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