all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
