i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
