Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
