if i died would you start the facebook group?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
