I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
