you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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