Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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