I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
