Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
