No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
