IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
