Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I skipped work to stalk him.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
