god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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