Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
