So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize