he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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