Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
