I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
