Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
