I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Four minutes until I can fart!
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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