as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
