I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
