i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
